It's Not Your Shame.
A love letter to my readers.
Recently, I read something about protecting the little girl who lives inside you.
It’s not the first time I’ve come across the idea, I’ve even written it into some of my books, but it’s the first time I personally looked back with zero shame.
Five-year-old me.
Eleven-year-old me.
Thirteen-year-old me.
Sixteen-year-old me.
And eighteen-year-old me.
These ages mark events in my life mentally filed under the category of shame.
The kind of shame that made me want to close my eyes, cover my face, curl into a ball, and hope to God nobody knew.
Saw.
Or remembered.
The interesting thing is that most of the things from which I felt such an immense longing to hide resulted from things done or instigated by other people.
When other people treat us like we’re nothing, especially in those formative years when we don’t yet know we are composed of magic, we internalize that message.
Then shame flares up to protect us. It tells us to get small, hide, run.
So, we do.
And then we practice, for years we practice being small. We continue to close our eyes to stones cast our way like it’s normal.
It is NOT.
The truth is, in all your most shameful moments, you deserved protection.
Or compassion.
Or both.
Because you are fully human and allowed to make mistakes.
Because no matter how you felt like a big girl when it happened, you were not.
You were small.
You deserved protection.
You still do.
The beauty and magic of it all is it’s not too late.
She’s still there.
Still waiting to be protected, accepted, and healed.
To be coaxed out of hiding.
Look at the women and women-in-making around you.
See that five-year-old, that eleven-year-old, that sixteen-year-old and ask yourself if they deserve compassion.
Understand you do as well.
As for the shame? Thank it for doing the hard work of keeping you safe. Tell it you’ve got it from here.
You’re going to do the hard work of protecting little you.
How old is the little girl inside you who needs you the most?
Unleash your magic.